A Hard Heart: Part 3

2) Remembering Death 

Something that I have realised amongst our youth, and with everyone else, is the reluctance of talking about death. It's an inevitable fact, whether you believe in God or not, that we will all die. But because our lives are such that we preoccupy ourselves, it's no hard answer into why we don't remember death. As Allah said, the gathering of death has deluded them of the realities of life and they only come to wake when they end up in their graves."The mutual rivalry for piling up (the good things of this world) diverts you (from the more serious things), until ye visit the graves. But nay, ye soon shall know the reality … " Qur'an 101:1-3

This ayah should startle you, but because people look at the actual ayah,  they don't look into the meanings of that particular ayah, and consequently you will never reap the benefits of it.f Truth to say, if things like that do not make you think, then what the prophet (SAW) should. He (SAW) said:

"I used to forbid you from visiting the graves in the early part of Islam. But now I command you to visit them because they serve to remind you of the next life". Going to the graveyard should make you think about what would happen to you, as the prophet also said: " The grave is either a garden from the gardens of Paradise or a hole from the holes of Hell Fire". There are people in the graves who are calling out for help but there is no one to help. When Munkar and Nakir come and ask them, " Who is your Lord?", " What is your religion?", Who was that Prophet that was sent to you? they will simply be unable to answer! 

Because of this we are encouraged to visit the graves. Although men are allowed, some scholars argue about whether the grave is prohibited to women, but that is the frequent visits that are prohibited due to women's sensitivity. Hence not regular visits, but women can go from time to time, as they need the reminder just as men do.

Sisters and brothers, if you ever want to overcome the hard heart that we all suffer from at some part of our life, we have to reflect on that life to come, since it is going to come, whether you like it or not. Reflecting on the process of death; the process of dying itself - how the souls are taken from the bodies of believers, as the Prophet (SAW) said "...Like water dropping from the spout of a bucket"; but for the disbelievers, "....Like silk being drawn over thorns", tearing away. That soul that ultimately fears Allah is taken in the next life into the Heavens and the angels of the Heavens will praise it. It will return the body and a Garden from Paradise will opened up to it and it will lie in that state till Resurrection. But for those whose hearts have hardened towards the remembrance of Allah, the soul will be barred entrance into the Heavens. It will be thrown back into the body. Their evil deeds will come before them as a horrible creature and they will suffer torments. A window of Hell will be open and the heat will be over them until Resurrection.

3) The Qur'an

The third way that we can soften our hearts is the Qur'an, as Allah has stated in Surah Hadid 57:16:

"Has not the time come for those who believe for their hearts to fear Allah when they hear theQur'an [dhikrullah here is in reference to the Qur'an] and what truth there is in it, so that they not be like those who received the Scripture before, but in the passage of time, their hearts became hard. And most of them are corrupt."

If we truly reflect on the Qur'an, it has the power to soften our hearts. Allah mentions about the Jiin who heard the Qur'an: 

"Indeed we heard an amazing Qur'an; it guides us to Allah and we believe in it and we will set not partners besides Allah."

When we hear the recitation of the Qur'an we should ponder on the meaning of it. The Qur'an should not be a replacement of music that many of us used to listen to. These days people buy recordings of their favourite reciter, merely because of the beauty of the voice, so if you think about it logically, the Qur'an has become a sort of musical thing. Allah even tells us:  "Will they not reflect on the meanings?"

The  Qur'an is a book of guidance and we should benefit from the meanings and, re-asses how we deal with the Qur'an. We should be reading it regularly and not leaving it until Ramadhan. It doesn't matter if we don't finish the Qur'an in Ramadhan. For most of the Prophet's (SAW) life, he did not finish the Qur'an in Ramadhan. Most of the companions did not finish the reading of the Qur'an in Ramadhan. However sad it is, Ramadhan is not complete unless we read the whole Qur'an in Ramadhan. We hire reciters to recite the Qur'an at 100 miles an hour so much so that even the Arabic- speaking people can't figure out where in the Qu'ran the reciter is at.

This has become a precedence, finishing the Qur'an in Ramadhan and if you can finish it twice, even better! But this is not the Qur'an is for . The Qur'an is for reflection, so that when we hear it, as Allah says of the believers who hear the Qur'an recited, goose bumps come over their skins. It touches them and causes their heart to tremble : "Allah has revealed (from time to time) the most beautiful Message in the form of a Book, consistent with itself, yet repeating (its teaching in various aspects): the skins of those who fear their Lord tremble threat; then their skins and hearts do soften to the remembrance of Allah."    39:12

If when we listen to the Qur'an, we don't find this reaction of tears coming to our eyes, then we should force ourselves to cry. You may question why but it is because we need to respond to the Qur'an in this way. If we don't, we are frankly lost! This is the word of Allah, the only preserved word of all the revelations that were given from Adam till now. This is the word God preserved.

A Hard Heart: Part 2

The sad thing for many of today's youth, is that although the deen is something that we've been taught, you'll never see that knowledge into practice. It's  seen as an obstacle for 'fitting in', so whenever they hear the Qur'an they may get a little agitated or whenever you put a islamic programme on or a lecture on youtube they may tell you to change it, or walk out into the room. This is a clear example of a hard heart.

Like others, I have sought a reasonable amount of knowledge many years ago but as the years have passed, I kept it away and got distracted. Today's world is materialistic, with everyone online and going crazy, it's not hard to find the culprit of the hard heart, especially with fitnah everywhere. As it is compulsory for us to seek knowledge of the deen, without a soft heart, we cannot taste the beauty of that knowledge. Al-Hasan al-basri had said 'If a man seeks knowledge, it will appear in his face, hands and tongue and in his humility to Allah.'

A hard heart will corrupt seeking knowledge and Da'wa because when the heart has hardened, the knowledge is of no benefit to the person, nor can other people benefit from it. Softness of the heart is the characteristic of true Muslims. If it is somehow absent, then the person's life is typically filled with distress and discomfort. This is the promise of Allah. Those who don't have hearts that are soft will lead woeful lives. As Allah said in the Qur'an (39:22) :"Woe to those whose hearts are hardened against the remembrance of Allah."

As I've outlined in the previous post, change only comes when you sincerely want it, so there is no use changing because 'you have to' by your parents or your peers, but for yourself. I tried that a ton of times, just changing because you have nothing else left, but as soon as I tried, I was back at the same cycle as before.

Many of the people who want to have a soft heart don't know where to start. I mean it seems logical, where shall you first seek in order to achieve the 'soft heart' that I have seemingly been talking about. I will now explain step by step in every post what you should do in order to achieve having a soft heart.

The first step into this would be :

 1) Dua or Supplication.

The first method is Du'aa or supplication. Nothing softens the heart more than calling unto your lord for guidance and to soften your heart. This is the promise of the Prophet (SAW) when he said :

"Call on Allah being certain that your prayer will be answered, but know at the same time that Allah will not answer the prayer of a heart which is negligent."

If we consider the many examples from the prophet and his companions, they would show us that it is Allah that changes our hearts. Let us consider Umar ibn Al-Khattab. His attitude towards the Messenger (SAW) and Islam was so harsh, he was sent out to kill the prophet one day. He was tired of this so called prophet and his message, so decided to finish it off with his own hands. He strapped his sword and was on his way. 

While he was walking to the Prophet's house, he encountered a companion that told him to check on his sister before he even thinks about touching the prophet, and when he came to the house, he virtually ripped the door open to hear Qur'an being read. He then struck his sister and saw the blood, which stopped him for a minute. What he had heart before touched his heart. He asked what was being read and then they replied the Qur'an, and from then he has changed. This was enough to turn his life upside down. 

This was Umar ! On a later occasion the companions saw him laughing and then the next minute he was crying. The companions, confused as they were asked what was the matter and Umar replied " I remember in the days of Jahiliyyah, I had a idol that was made out of dates, one day I became so hungry I ate a piece from it. And then, I cried because I remember when I was burying my daughter. 

Whilst I was putting her in, she brushed the sand out of my beard". This was a practice that was widespread at the time,that if they felt that having a daughter was a dishonour, then you should kill them. That was how hard his heart was, so hard that he buried his daughter alive.

But his heart changed. Changed so much that when Umar' used to lead the prayers, he used to be so choked up with tears, that the third row could hear him crying. This was Umar, a man that was a harsh person, but  with the acceptance of  Islam, his heart was turned around.

We should do as the prophet advised us to do, to go to Allah and call unto him to give us soft hearts and we should seek refuge as the Prophet had from the heart without fear. And in the same Du'a, he also sought refuge from the eyes that do not become full with tears; eyes which never cry.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxMckaIwZF8

A Hard Heart: Part 1

We all make mistakes.
But knowing you make them and consequently not doing anything about it, will through time become a part of you.

It doesn't matter what you are and what kind of mistakes or bad habits you have done or what you have, but change only comes when you want it.

Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves.

This applies to everyone to be honest. Having such a nature where you are hard- headed and just keep sinning without repenting creates a hard heart. A hard heart is not something anyone wants to have, especially someone that is trying to practice Islam. But nothing comes easy, and as you've put yourself in this position, with the help of Allah and hopefully the people around you, then you will be able to change the condition of your heart.


So how do you really know whether you have a hard heart?
I mean most people coming across this for the first time wouldn't really understand where I'm coming from as they would take the term 'hard heart' literally, but that isn't the case.


The Prophet Muhammed (SAW) informed us in a very famous tradition, commonly quoted with reference to halal  and haram, about the importance of the heart. He said:

" There is in the body a clump of flesh- if it becomes good, the whole body becomes good, and if it becomes bad, the whole body becomes bad. And indeed it is the heart.

This mere snippet of the hadith already outlines to us how important the heart is, the fact that if it was bad then the whole body will be bad and if it was good then the body will appear good. Scientifically it is the same, as without your heart functioning properly, or any problems to do with the heart, it will deteriorate, but if your heart is sound and healthy then your whole body will continue functioning right.


Spiritually however, the bad would seemingly mean the bad deeds and the good would mean the good deeds but bare in mind good deeds with no valid intention would be fruitless, while bad deeds in any circumstances are damaging to the heart. The key to creating an obstacle so you wouldn't even go near that bad deed would be repenting and doing a good deed on top of it, creating a sort of firewall to that sin.